8 types of parenting styles that can lead to trauma in children
Check out some of the most common parenting styles that can lead to trauma in children, so you can make informed decisions about how to parent your child in a way that supports their healthy development and emotional well-being.
Parenting is a tough job, and there is no one-size-fits-all approach that works for every child. However, certain parenting styles can have unintended consequences, particularly when it comes to a child's emotional and psychological well-being. While many parents strive to do their best, certain types of parenting styles can actually lead to trauma in children, with lasting effects that can impact their lives well into adulthood. Here are some of the most common parenting styles that can lead to trauma in children. By understanding the potential risks associated with these styles, you can make informed decisions about how to parent your child in a way that supports their healthy development and emotional well-being. (Also read: Parenting tips to teach a child the value of money )
"Parenting is tough and no one expects parents to be perfect. Good parents need to strike the right balance of teaching independence v.s. safety, fun v.s. responsibility and rules v.s. freedom. Ultimately, one aspect that all good parents have is the ability to listen to their children and communicate with them, even if they're doing something they don't like. Mistakes are inevitable, but at least we want to say we did our best," says, Ron Yap, mental health expert, educator and writer. He shared some most common types of parenting styles that lead to trauma in children, in his recent Instagram post.
1. "Toughen up" parenting
This is when parents tell their children to 'suck it up' even when they have reached their limits which tells them that their needs are unimportant.
2. Helicopter parenting
This refers to parents who hover around children all the time, preventing them from discovering themselves and asserting their identity.
3. Inconsistent parenting
When parents set unclear or changing rules, guidelines and values it often means children must get good at guessing what their parents want, creating a sense of confusion and instability.
4. "Deal with it yourself" parenting
When parents leave their children to solve every problem even when they're helpless. Of course, children should still learn to be independent, but this extreme often causes hyper-independence in adults.
5. Emotionally neglectful parenting
Parents like these simply think that providing food, water and basic needs is good enough. But when you don't address your child's emotional needs, it causes a long-lasting sense of abandonment.
6. Treating the child as a parent
Also known as parentification, this is when children are given responsibilities (emotional or physical) akin to that of an adult which causes them to grow up earlier and not enjoy their youth.
7. Conditional love parenting
This is when parents gatekeep the love and affection that all children deserve behind grades, achievements and other arbitrary measures which teaches them that they're only worthy when they've achieved stuff.
8. Comparison-based parenting
When parents treat everything as a competition, comparing their children to cousins, friends and neighbours and even pitting siblings against each other or choosing favourites which causes children to feel like they're never good enough.