Things parents unknowingly do that distance them from their kids
Parenting is hard, many times parents unknowingly do things that shut their children off from them. Here is a list of a few things that parents should avoid.
Parents usually want the best for their kids and always wish them well, but a lot of the time they unknowingly do things that put distance between them and their kids. Parents frequently find themselves asking, "Why is my child acting so distantly toward me?" Your parenting decisions and behaviours may hold the key to the solution. Parents frequently blame their kids for the way they interact with them. The problem is how you handle these flaws; it doesn't necessarily mean that you are a horrible parent. Do you refuse to accept responsibility and assert your innocence because you're a parent, or do you own up to your actions and rebuild your relationship with your child? Do not forget that even though your child is an adult, you are still a more mature person than they are. (Also read: Biggest parenting mistakes that destroy children's mental health )
" Parenting is hard, you have to strike the right balance of freedom and guidance. Of course, generally, it's not right for children to completely abandon their parents. But for many, shutting themselves off from their parents is a natural and logical choice. As a parent, the most important thing is to show that you care. You don't have to be perfect, but putting in effort and communicating with your children can go miles in building a solid foundation." says Ron Yap, Mental Health Specialist and Advocator, in his recent Instagram post. He further suggested things that parents should avoid doing.
- Being verbally or emotionally abusive/judging them endlessly forces children to be silent as their only way of coping.
- Refusing to explain why they do things the child does not like, even if there's a good reason for it.
- And then becoming needy and clingy when their children become adults.
- Exacting the same struggles that their parents gave them in their childhood, forcing them to become cycle breakers by creating distance from the family.
- Not fulfilling the child's emotional needs (emotional neglect), forcing them to seek it from other sources or cover up their desire for love.
- Spousification: When parents turn to their children for emotional support while not caring as much about their children's needs, causing them to create distance at the first opportunity.
- On the opposite end, babying and infantilizing their children even as they grow older, causes them to think, "never grow up until I get away from my parents."
- Restricting their child's freedom to an unreasonable degree, causing them to seek independence at all costs.